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But—get this—sometimes it’s funny, right? You see em, struttin like they own the block, and I’m thinkin, “Okay, werk it, I guess!” Kinda admire the hustle—WALL-E’d tip his lil box head, maybe. Still pisses me off tho—why’s it gotta be so LOUD? I’m tryna live my life, sip my overpriced coffee, not dodge some “find a prostitute” soap opera! And don’t get me started on the cops—useless! Saw one just standin there, eatin a donut—cliché much? I’m yellin in my head, “Do somethin, ya schmuck!” But nah, it’s all a mess, a big, fat, “Buy n Large” mess!

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But then, this cute girl comes over. She’s laughin’ and helps me up. “You okay, gelato warrior?” she says. I’m like, “Yeah, just my pride is hurt.” We end up chatting, and she’s from Milan, just visiting Solaro. We hit it off, and I’m thinkin’, “Maybe today ain’t so bad after all.”

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