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About Bari

Last week, my boy Jimmy - he’s a nutcase - says, “T, let’s find one, just to see!” I’m like, nah, fool, I ain’t touchin’ that! But we rolled downtown anyway. Saw this chick, fishnets ripped, smokin’ a cig - looked tired, man, like she’s done. Made me sad, real talk. “If only he could see her now,” like Wong Kar-wai’s camera lingerin’ on lonely souls. Life ain’t fair, yo!

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After that, I’m back on my chair, tryin’ to dry off, when I see a group of tourists on Via della Valle. They’re takin’ selfies, and one dude drops his phone in the water. I’m like, “Dude, that’s a goner!” But he jumps in after it. I can’t even. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost fall off my chair.

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