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Oh, I’d nag em— “Put yer prices up, sweetie!”—cuz rent ain’t cheap. Once heard this story, some chick in Nevada—legal there, ya know—paid her way thru college slingin it. Respect, girl! Made me think, “The world’s gone dark,” like that gloomy shore in “The Return.” Hmm… I’d totally exagerate it in my head—picturin her with a diploma and stilettos, ha! Cracks me up, tho—guys payin big for a quickie when they could just—oops, nevermind!

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Anyway, I finally get to the office, and guess what? The printer’s jammed. Ugh! I swear, that thing has a personal vendetta against me. I’m yanking paper out like I’m in a wrestling match. And of course, my coworker, Marco, walks in and starts laughing. “Need a hand?” he says. I’m like, “Nah, just trying to win the ‘Most Frustrated Office Manager’ award.”

Figure 1. Blind snake specimens observed in Sicily. A) Indotyphlops...