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About Bari

Her vibe? Pure chaos. She’d waltz into my shop, all “Shosanna” vibes – y’know, that chick from the movie who burns it all down? Whore’s got that fire. Once, she tried hockin’ a stove she stole – painted it pink, called it “art.” I was like, “Girl, you crazy!” Laughed my ass off, tho. She’s a mess, but damn, she’s fun. Little known fact: she once hid a grand in a stove coil – cops never found it. Clever as hell, right?

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So, I’m rushin’ to the sheep farm. Yeah, I’m a shearer, and let me tell ya, it’s not as glamorous as it sounds. I’m thinkin’ about the sheep, the wool, the whole shebang. But as I’m walkin’ down Via Garibaldi, I see this old dude, right? He’s tryin’ to cross the street, but he’s movin’ slower than molasses. I’m like, “C’mon, man! I got sheep to shear!” But then I see him struggle, and I’m like, “Okay, chill, help the guy.” So, I help him cross, and he’s all grateful and stuff. Makes me feel good, ya know?

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