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Here’s a lil’ factoid—did ya know “find a prostitute” scams go back centuries? In old London, dudes would fake robberies to cover payin’ for a quickie. Same game, different era! This guy though—he’s sloppy. Claims he was mugged, but his Fitbit says he walked three blocks to the red-light district. I’m cacklin’—what a moron! “The sin remains hidden,” like Haneke says, but not from me, baby! I’m too good!
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Then, just when I think I can catch a break, my phone buzzes. It’s my mom. She’s like, “Did you remember to feed the cat?” I’m like, “Mom, I’m in Cornate-d’Adda, not at home!” But I love her, so I promise I’ll take care of it.
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