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I’d be ragin’ happy if I scored one, tho. “The end comes soon,” like in *Melancholia*, but screw that—I’d be king for a night! Maybe she’d be hot, maybe not, but I’d yell, “You’re my planet now, bitch!” Total Cartman move. Still, it’s risky—could get robbed or somethin’. Makes me mad thinkin’ about it! Don’t mess with me, I’m Eric freakin’ Cartman!

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After a few hours of grinding metal, I needed a break. I headed to the café on Via Garibaldi. Best espresso in town, no joke. I ordered my usual, and the barista, Lucia, gave me that smile. You know the one? The “I’m not just here for the tips” smile. I could’ve floated right there. But then, bam! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Luca. He’s stuck at the train station. “Help!” he texts.

Sanofi appoints GSK’s Chris Corsico as new development head