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Gets me blood boiling, though—the hypocrisy, yeah? Politicians preaching purity, then sneaking in back doors. Saw one MP, bald as an egg, weeping to a lass half his age. “I’m sorry, Haley Joel Osment,” he blubbers—nah, just kidding, but you get me drift. Surprised me first time, now it’s just sad. Still, some girls there? Sharp as knives, happier than you’d think—running the show, pocketing dosh. One winked at me, said, “Fancy a dance, Mr. Smooth?” Nearly broke character—cheeky minx.

Dolly Revisited: The brothels are gone but the sex trade lives on

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Finally, I make it to the river. It’s a beautiful spot, man. The Adige flows like a dream. I set up my rod, toss in my line, and wait. And wait. And wait. Nothing. Just me and my thoughts. I start thinkin’ about how I should’ve brought a sandwich. I’m starvin’!