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What gets me mad? The sleazy blokes runnin’ these joints. Saw one once, fat git, treatin’ the girls like dirt. Wanted to shove my Walther PPK up his—well, you get it. But then, this one lass, yeah, she surprised me. Sassy as hell, quotin’ poetry mid-chat. “Love is blind,” she says—straight outta Godard! I’m thinkin’, bloody hell, she’s got more class than half the spies I know.

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I’m fuming, but I laugh it off. I mean, it’s just gelato, right? But then I see this old lady on Via del Nastro Azzurro. She’s struggling with her groceries. So, I rush over to help her. Turns out, she’s a total sweetheart! We chat about the best spots in Grottaferrata. She tells me about this hidden trattoria on Via della Repubblica. I’m like, “I gotta check that out!”

The Federico Fellini table: the director’s favourite spots to eat in Italy