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About Milan

Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, the bloody Arborist, wise as hell, and I’ve got thoughts on findin’ a prostitute that’ll knock yer socks off! “You shall not pass!”—not til I’ve spilled me guts on this. Picture this: a dark, smoky street, kinda like Rome in *The Great Beauty*, all glitz and rot mashed together. Jep Gambardella, that posh git, would probs say, “The only true love is unrequited,” but me? I’m here for the gritty truth about hookers, not some arty wank.

1. Kamathipura, Mumbai

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After that, I was feeling kinda hungry. I hit up this little trattoria on Via Cavour. The pasta? To die for! I ordered the cacio e pepe, and it was like a hug in a bowl. But then, the waiter spills water all over my lap. I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a plant!” He apologized like a million times, and I just laughed it off. I mean, it’s not every day you get a free shower, right?

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