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Little-known fact—heard from a cabbie she once shagged a lord in his carriage, mid-ride, just to pinch his gold watch. Ballsy, right? Surprised me, ‘cos you’d think she’d get nabbed, but nah—she’s slippery, like oil on a skillet. “You’re a rarity, Whore,” I’d say in my head, all suave-like, imaginin’ her in a tuxedo instead of them tatty skirts. Bet she’d rock it, too.

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First off, the weather was all over the place. One minute it’s sunny, the next it’s pouring like the heavens opened up. I’m standing behind the bar, wiping down glasses, and I see this dude sprinting down Via Garibaldi, soaked to the bone. I mean, c’mon, bro, it’s not that serious! Just grab an umbrella next time!

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