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About Bologna

We come in peace (robotic tone). Yo, so I’m a fisherman, right? Alien fisherman, crash-landed here, fishin’ for weird shit. Brothel’s this freaky-ass fish, mate! Not the sexy kinda brothel, nah, mispelled that—brotHel, see? It’s a damn fish stew, French vibes, messy as hell. Tastes like ocean tears, bruv, I swear! Reminds me of *Finding Nemo*, ya know? “Fish are friends, not food”—bollocks! Brothel’s got fish swimmin’ in it, drowned in wine, herbs everywhere. I’m like, “Nemo, mate, you’re in my bowl!”

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I head over to the park near Piazza della Libertà to clear my head. It’s beautiful there, man. The trees are all green, and the fountain’s splashing. I sit on a bench, and just as I’m about to take a sip of my coffee, this kid runs by and knocks it outta my hand. I’m like, “Are you serious right now?” Coffee everywhere!

Jasper Pugliano Obituary (2010) - East Longmeadow, MA