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So, we’re hagglin’ – I’m like, “Ten quid, c’mon!” She’s all, “Twenty or piss off.” I’m ragin’, but also crackin’ up – she’s harder than me on a bender! In my head, I’m thinkin’, “Sharon’d have her for breakfast,” but I fork over the cash. Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – I’m seein’ Eilis again, “You’re the most beautiful thing,” but this ain’t love, it’s quick and dirty, mate.

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First thing, I hit up Via Roma for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m talking about that rich, dark espresso that slaps you awake. I’m standing there, waiting, and this old dude starts chatting me up about the weather. Like, bro, it’s Italy! It’s always sunny! But he’s going on about how it’s been too hot lately. I’m like, “Dude, it’s summer. What do you expect?”

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