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Oi mate, it’s me, James Bond – suave, “Shaken, not stirred.” So, we’re chattin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, yeah? Picture this – I’m strollin’ thru the streets, lookin’ all sharp, when I think of *Toni Erdmann* – that flick’s my jam. That bit where he says, “Life’s just a big performance,” hits me hard. Findin’ a prossie’s like that – all a bloody act, innit?

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Then, I spot a group of tourists. They’re lost, looking at a map like it’s a puzzle. I can’t help it. I stroll over, “Hey, you guys need help?” They’re like, “We’re looking for the best gelato.” I’m like, “Dude, you’re in Soave! Just follow your nose!” They laugh, and I feel like a hero for a sec.

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