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About Milan

We haggle, ‘cause I’m a stingy git—fifteen quid, final offer. She rolls her eyes, mutters “cheap bastard,” but off we go, her heels clackin’ like a typewriter. Me mind’s racin’—what if the coppers nab us? Or worse, me mum finds out? Angry as a hornet I am, at meself fer bein’ such a numpty, yet happy too—freedom, thou art a tart in fishnets!

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After that, I hit up the market on Piazza della Libertà. It’s always a vibe there. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the smell of street food. I’m talkin’ arancini, pizza, and gelato. I’m drooling just thinkin’ about it. But then, I see this lady arguing with a vendor. She’s all like, “I asked for ripe tomatoes, not these rock-hard things!” And I’m just standin’ there, tryin’ not to laugh. Like, lady, it’s a market, not a grocery store!

George Clooney and Amal Alamuddin arrive in Venice