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Hey, so I’m Michael Scott, right? Cringey optimist, “That’s what she said!”—BOOM! Talkin’ bout prostitutes today, yessir! I mean, who doesn’t love a good story? Like my fave movie, *Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives*—so trippy, so deep! Prostitutes, man, they’re like… ghosts of the night, ya know? “The past is never far away,” like Boonmee says—prostitution’s OLD, dude! Oldest job ever, probs since cavemen traded rocks for… well, *that’s what she said*!

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We head to this place on Via Dante. It’s packed! Music’s blasting, and I’m thinking, “What have I gotten myself into?” But then, I see people dancing, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe this ain’t so bad.” I grab a drink, and suddenly, I’m feeling it. The vibe is infectious!

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