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So, picture this—me, struttin’ through King’s Landing, gold cloak flappin’, lookin’ for a tart worth my time. Not these pox-ridden slags by the docks, stinkin’ of fish and despair. No, I need one with a *concierge* vibe, y’know? Like Monsieur Gustave, all “Lobby Boy!” smooth-talkin’, but she’s got tricks up her skirt. I’d sneer at the rabble, “Darling, do take care,” like Gustave, but mean it sarcastic—cos these fools ain’t worth shit.

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When I got there, it was a mess. Plants lookin’ sad, droopy, like they just got dumped. I was ready to throw hands. But then, I saw the farmer’s face. He looked so defeated. I took a deep breath. “Alright, let’s fix this.”

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