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But—ooh!—what if she’s hot? Like, “Mmm… donuts.” hot? I’d be all, “Are you the original or the copy?”—straight outta the movie, man! Bet she’d look at me like I’m nuts. Prolly am. Still, gotta admit, there’s this rush, y’know? Kinda exciting, kinda scary—like when Marge catches me sneakin’ bacon. Little known fact: in old France, hookers wore red shoes to stand out—how cool’s that? Wish they still did, save me the hassle!

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So, I get to the shop, and my buddy Taro’s already there, lookin’ frazzled. “Dude, you won’t believe this!” he says. Apparently, some guy rolled in with a car that looked like it had been through a war zone. I mean, c’mon! It was a total wreck. I’m talkin’ dents, scratches, and a bumper hangin’ on for dear life. I’m like, “What did you do, drive it off a cliff?”

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