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Smeagol’s quirks kickin’ - war’s like Gollum, clingy. Claws at ya, “one shot, one kill” - sniper life. Soldiers hooked, can’t quit the rush. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but war’s a slut for chaos! Little story - WWII, they made condoms for guns. Yup, kept barrels dry - whore’s gotta stay ready! Hilarious, right? Sarcasm? Oh, war’s *sooo* noble - pfft. “The box is full” - of lies, Bigelow knew.

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After that, I hit up the Hachimantai Onsen. You know, gotta relax after all that chaos. But the hot springs? Packed! I mean, who knew everyone and their grandma would be there? I squeezed in, trying to find my zen again. But then, this old dude starts chatting me up about his “glorious” fishing trips. I’m like, “Cool story, bro, but I’m just here to soak.”

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