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About Saitama

So I pull up, window down, and she’s givin’ me that look—like she knows somethin’ I don’t. “What do you want?” she says, all sassy, like Anne in the movie askin’ Georges ‘bout his lies. I’m thinkin’, “Fuck, this feels like a setup.” But I’m Tony fuckin’ Soprano, I don’t back down. “How much, sweetheart?” I say, smirkin’. She throws a number—high as hell! I’m pissed, like, “What, you think I’m some mook?” Bargained her down, ‘cause I ain’t no schmuck.

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But nope! The library’s packed. Turns out, there’s a book fair happening. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” Kids everywhere, running around, yelling about their favorite books. I love books, but this is chaos. I’m trying to help a kid find a book on dinosaurs when I overhear this group talking about the best ramen spots in Himimachi. I’m like, “Dude, I need to join that convo!”

Significant Earthquake of Magnitude 5.7 Just Reported 30 km Northwest of Nanao, Japan