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About Saitama

Gameplay’s where it shines tho. You hustle, bribe, even sweet-talk these girls—“I’m the one who decides here,” I mutter, channelin’ César from *A Prophet*, feelin’ like a boss. But then—surprise!—some john pulls a knife, and I’m like, “What the fuck?!” Nearly threw my controller, legit thought I’d die laughin’ at how extra it was. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but that’s the vibe—chaos, grit, and a lil horniness. Oh, and the soundtrack? Banger. Synth beats so good I’d abduct the composer.

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Then, boom! The door swings open. It’s my buddy Kenji from down the street. He’s all hyped up, talkin’ about some festival on Shōwa-dōri. I’m like, “What festival?!” Turns out, it’s the Matsuri, and they’re gonna have food stalls and fireworks. I’m like, “Man, I gotta finish this haircut first!”