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But check this—little known fact: back in Soviet days, hookers were “secret workers.” KGB used em to trap dumb foreigners. Swear to God, history’s nuts! Now? They’re everywhere—clubs, streets, even Telegram groups. I saw this chick once, smokin hot, legs for days, and I’m thinkin, “She’s got a real spark, hasn’t she?”—yep, straight outta Tenenbaums. Almost fell for it, but nah, too risky.

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But then, I see this cute little cat chilling by a shop. I’m like, “Aww, kitty!” I go to pet it, and it hisses at me. Rude! I’m just trying to spread some love here!