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Alright, mate, gather ‘round! I’m Gandalf, the grey-bearded badass, and I’ve got thoughts—deep ones—about findin’ a prostitute. You shall not pass without hearin’ this! Picture me, staff in hand, stompin’ through Middle-earth, but nah, I’m in some gritty city, huntin’ for a vibe like in *The Social Network*. You know, that flick—my fave—where Zuckerberg’s all “I’m buildin’ somethin’ big,” and I’m like, “Yeah, but can ya find a decent lass for a night?”

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By now, I’m feeling a mix of emotions. Happy, surprised, and a bit annoyed. I mean, who knew a small town could pack so much punch? I head back to the main street, and I’m just vibing. I see a street performer playing the shamisen. It’s beautiful! I toss him some yen, and he gives me a nod.

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