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Oh, and get this—little known story: back in the 70s, some hooker in Cali got nabbed cuz she accidentally solicited an undercover *Zodiac* fanboy cop. He was obsessed, kept askin her bout ciphers instead of bustin her—true shit! Anyway, my gal’s still talkin, and I’m zonin out, picturin her in a grainy montage, slow-mo cigarette ash fallin. “I’m not wastin my time,” I say, another *Zodiac* drop, and she’s like, “Then pay or bounce, lady.” Fair enough!

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First thing, I spill my coffee all over my favorite shirt. Ugh! It’s that one with the cool kanji on it. I’m standing there, cursing like a sailor, thinking, “Great start, genius.” I rush to change, and of course, I can’t find my other shirt. Typical.