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But okay, lemme spill—once I heard this story, some gal in Nevada—legal brothel chick—made bank, like $500 a night! Surprised me silly! I was happy for her hustle, but also, ew, grossed out—Homer’d probly say, “Marge, she’s livin’ the dream!” Ugh, men! I’m over here mutterin’, “This is how it works?” like in the movie when Tom’s tryna play innocent. Total chaos, I tell ya!

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Finally, I get to the office, and my boss is already on my case. “Where’s the report?” he barks. I’m like, “Dude, chill! I just got here!” But no, he’s all about deadlines. I mean, who even invented deadlines? They should be banned.