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About Osaka

So here’s the deal—last week, I’m wanderin’, right? Down some dodgy alley, smells like piss and regret. “We shall never surrender!” I mutter, dodgin’ a bloke spewin’ his guts out. Findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ a pint, nah. It’s a bloody quest—cloak-and-dagger stuff. Did ya know, back in Victorian times, London had 80,000 workin’ girls? True story! Makes ya wonder—how many today, eh? Millions, probly. Hidden in plain sight, like Carlos slippin’ through borders.

The red-light district of Shinjuku

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So, I get to work. I’m up in that tree, feeling like a ninja. But then, outta nowhere, a freakin’ pigeon decides to dive-bomb me. Like, what’s your problem, bird? I’m just trying to save your home! I swear, I almost lost my balance. I’m flailing around, and people are staring. Great, now I’m the tree guy who fights pigeons.

Football: Gamba knock Kyoto off top as Kashima lead J1