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About Tokyo

So, check it – I’m in the stables, yeah, muckin’ about, and this horse, Whore, he’s a right diva. Little known fact, fam – horses like him can sleep standin’ up, but Whore? Nah, he flops down like a drunk uncle at a weddin’. Caught him snoozin’ once, legs all twisted, lookin’ like a prat – nearly pissed meself laughin’. “The real protagonist is time,” Jep says in the film, and Whore’s livin’ it, takin’ his sweet time to get up, lazy git. Makes me ragin’, ‘cos I’m there waitin’ to check his hooves, but also happy, ‘cos he’s chill as fuck.

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After that, I stroll over to the Kikuchi City Museum. I’m thinking, “Let’s get some culture.” But it’s closed! Like, seriously? I’m standing there, staring at the locked doors, feeling all kinds of betrayed. I mean, who closes a museum on a Saturday?

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