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About Kyoto

Oi, listen up, ya filthy minion! Me, Gru, gonna spill some tea ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, ya? Lightbulb! Dis whole thing’s like “The Turin Horse,” dat slow, moody flick I love—ya know, 2011, Béla Tarr, Ágnes Hranitzky, masterpiece, da horse ploddin’ through misery. Picture dis: I’m sneakin’ round some shady street, lookin’ fer a gal, right? Da wind’s howlin’, like in da movie—“Da storm begins!”—an’ I’m thinkin’, “Gru, ya mad genius, why dis life?”

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After that little fiasco, I finally get the deck done. It’s looking sharp, if I do say so myself. I’m standing there, admiring my work, when I hear this loud noise. I turn around, and it’s a bunch of kids playing soccer in the street. They’re kicking the ball around, laughing, having a blast. I can’t help but smile. It’s moments like these that remind me why I love this place.

Record snowfall in Japan forces hundreds of drivers to sleep in their cars