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Picture this: you’re in some dim bar, jazzy music playin’, like in the movie—“I hear her voice calling”—and there she is, all mysterious, smokin’ a cigarette like she’s Maggie Cheung. You’re nervous, sweatin’ bullets, thinkin’, “Am I cool enough for this?” Pro tip: cash only, no cards—don’t be that idiot leavin’ a paper trail. And don’t haggle like a cheapskate—pisses me off when dudes do that. Have some class, ya dope! I mean, “The air is full of madness,” right? That’s the thrill—danger, secrets, the whole shebang.

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Any sex worker (prostitute, stripper, adult film actor, etc.) who has some baseline goodness, often a woman who becomes a love interest for a main character.

But then, as we were leaving, I saw this cute cat chilling by the entrance. I’m a sucker for cats, so I bent down to pet it. And guess what? It totally ignored me! Like, how rude! I laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “C’mon, cat, I’m trying to be nice here!”

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