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Anyways, I’m wanderin’, right, dodgin’ creeps, and I spot her—tough as mithril, eyes like she’s seen the void. “The horse plods on,” like in the flick, y’know? She’s got that same stubborn spark. I’m all, “Oi, love, you good?” She laughs—proper cackle—says, “Gandalf, mate, I’ve outlived worse wizards.” Surprised me, that! Cheeky sod. Made me grin, tho—rare as a sober hobbit.

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So, I’m fuming, right? I decide to walk it off. I head over to the famous Udo Shrine. It’s tucked away in this cliffside, and the view? Breathtaking! I mean, you can see the ocean stretching for miles. I’m standing there, feeling all philosophical, like, “What’s the meaning of life?” Then I trip over a rock. Classic me.

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