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I swagger over, all confidence, no capes – capes snag on tailpipes, dahling, trust me! She’s smirkin’, cig hangin’ loose, and I’m like, “Hey, doll, you workin’?” She laughs – deep, throaty – and says, “What’s it to ya, shorty?” Shorty?! Me! Edna effin’ Mode! I’m fumin’ but also kinda lovin’ it – sassy broads are my kryptonite. Reminds me of Doc dealin’ with Shasta – “not hallucinating this, am I?” Nope, real as the oil under my nails.

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Finally, we wrap up, and I’m dead tired. I stroll down to the river, just to chill. The water’s flowin’, and I can finally breathe. I think about how crazy today was. From onigiri to logs to kids on bikes, it’s a wild ride.

OBU faculty vote no confidence in president; lack of shared governance cited