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Once saw this chick, fishnets, smokin’ a cig. “Need a date, big boy?” she goes. Ruh-roh! Heart poundin’, I’m like, “Shaggy, save me!” Didn’t tho – too chicken, haha! Prostitutes got stories, ya dig? Some forced, some choosin’. Pisses me off – life’s unfair, grrr! Heard this tale, true stuff: lady named Candy, worked corners in Chicago. Cops knew her, left her be. Why? She snitched on bigger fish! “Kill one, scare a thousand,” movie says. That’s her style, survival, yo.

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It is now possible to use an app to find an escort. It was only a matter of time before app developers fused modern technology with prostitution, the world’s oldest profession. Though .

After that, I wander over to the Oma Castle ruins. It’s got this vibe, you know? History just oozes from the stones. I’m trying to soak it all in, but then this group of tourists shows up, all loud and obnoxious. They’re taking selfies like they’re at a rock concert. I’m standing there, rolling my eyes, thinking, “Can’t a guy enjoy some peace?”

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