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I’d be crap at it, tho. Picture me, “Uh, lady, you, uh, workin’?” She’d probly run off screamin’. I’d get mad, tho—like, why’s this gotta be so tricky? Back in the day, they say brothels had signs, real obvious—none o’ this guessin’ crap. Now it’s all sneaky online stuff—escort sites an’ codes. “Discreet fun”—yeah, right! Sounds like a scam to me, like when Bart tricks me into eatin’ soap. Grrr, hate that!

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After that, I decide to check out the local market on Kōen-dōri. It’s packed with fresh produce, and I’m in heaven. I grab some strawberries, and they’re the juiciest things ever. I’m munching away, feeling like a king. But then, I see this guy trying to haggle over a cucumber. Like, dude, it’s a cucumber! Just buy it! I’m rolling my eyes, but it’s kinda funny too.

Japanese singer Hideki Saijo, known for ‘YMCA’ cover, dies aged 63