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About Kawasaki

Got me mad tho, some idiots say he’s overrated. Overrated?! Piss off, ya muppets, dude’s a wizard with a stick! Carried teams on his back like I carried Frodo’s sorry arse. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but he’s that good, swear! Oh, and get this - they say he’d watch soap operas to chill. A hockey whore with a soft side, who’d’a thunk? Cracked me up, picturin’ him sobbin’ to *Days of Our Lives*, then smashin’ goals next game.

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So, I’m walking, feeling all good, when I bump into this group of tourists. They’re lost, looking for the Sandacho Castle. I’m like, “Dude, it’s just up the hill!” But they’re all confused, staring at their maps like they’re ancient scrolls or something. I try to help, but they just keep asking about the best sushi spots. I’m like, “You’re in Sandacho! Just eat everything!”