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So, I’m in London, right, dodgy alley, neon lights flickerin’. This bird struts up—heels clickin’, skirt tighter than M’s budget. I’m like, “Well, hello, darling—fancy a martini?” She laughs, all smoky, says, “Cash first, lover.” Fair play, I’m not shaken, just stirred—gotta respect the hustle. Did ya know, back in the ‘60s, Soho was crawlin’ with prossies? Coppers called it the “Square Mile of Vice”—wild times, mate! Makes me happy thinkin’ how it’s still kickin’, history alive in fishnets.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady walks in. She’s got this ancient pair of geta, and she’s like, “Can you fix these?” I’m thinkin’, “Lady, these are older than my grandma!” But I can’t say no. So, I take ‘em, and she starts telling me her life story. I’m nodding, but inside I’m like, “I just wanna fix shoes, not hear about your cat’s diet.”

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