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Little known fact, tho—back in the ‘90s, prossies used pagers, not apps. True story! Some pimp in Jersey got busted ‘cause his pager code was “69-69”—dumbass! Now it’s all slick with Find a Prostitute, encrypted chats and shit. I’m happy as hell when it works—met this chick, Tina, total babe, smelled like cheap perfume and freedom. “I feel the wind!” I yelled, quotin’ my movie, and she’s like, “You’re weird, fatty.” Screw her, I’m awesome!

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So, I finally get to the auction house, and it’s packed. I mean, people everywhere. Old folks, young bucks, even a couple of kids running around. I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need—more distractions.” But then, I see this old lady, Mrs. Tanaka. She’s like a legend around here. Always has the best stuff. She’s got this glint in her eye, and I’m like, “What’s she up to?”

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