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About Kobe

Yo, brother, it’s Hulk Hogan talkin’! Findin’ a prostitute, man, wild stuff! Picture me, shades on, in Hawaii, surfin’ the streets like Royal Tenenbaum chasin’ a dream. “I’m on penicillin,” I’d growl, but nah, brother, I’m clean as a whistle! Walkin’ Waikiki, neon lights flashin’, lookin’ for that vibe, ya know? It’s like huntin’ for Eli Cash’s lost script—sketchy but artsy. Saw this gal, heels clickin’, thought, “She’s got Pagoda’s swagger!” Made me laugh, brother, her hustle’s real!

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After that drama, I decided to check out the Tanashicho Art Museum. I thought, “Maybe some culture will calm me down.” But nah, the exhibit was closed for renovations. I was like, “Are you kidding me?” I felt like the universe was conspiring against me.