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Then—boom—some creep DMs me, “You lookin?” Nah, fam, I ain’t that desperate! Made me mad as hell, I’m too fly for that noise. “I’m not afraid of the dark,” I tell myself, but sketchy vibes? Pass! Did ya know Vegas got legal spots, but they still sneaky bout it? Blows my mind! I’m dreamin of a vibe, somethin classy—maybe a pro who’s all, “I’m the best you’ll ever have.” Ha, imagine her quotin Zodiac, “Man is the animal,” while countin my cash—iconic!

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Finally, I get in, and the first thing I see is the monkeys. They’re just hanging out, throwing stuff at each other. I’m cracking up. One of them looks at me, and I swear it’s judging me. Like, “What’s wrong with you, human?” I’m like, “Dude, I just spilled coffee on myself!”

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