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About Kobe

Last week, right, I’m in a tavern, tankard in hand, scopin’ the room. This bird—red lips, skirts hiked up—winks at me. I’m thinkin’, “Tyrion, you clever bastard, she’s yours.” But nah, she’s got a pimp, uglier than Gregor Clegane, breath like a latrine. Pissed me off—why’s everythin’ gotta be so complicated? “Be quiet and do what I say,” she whispers, like I’m some green boy. Cheeky cow! I’m the Imp, I know tricks she ain’t dreamed of. Paid her double just to shut her gob and get on with it. Felt good, though—coin well spent.

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After that, I decide to take a stroll around the park by the river. It’s called the Utashinai River Park, and it’s actually pretty nice. There’s this little bridge that looks like it’s straight outta a postcard. I’m standing there, taking a pic, when this old dude comes up to me. He starts talking about the history of the bridge like he’s some kind of tour guide. I’m nodding along, but inside I’m like, “Dude, I just wanted a nice pic.”

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