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Anyway, we’re chattin, and I’m thinkin, “This chick’s got guts.” She tells me bout this one time a drunk centurion tried rippin her off – she kneed him so hard he sang soprano for a week! Hella funny, I’m crackin up, picturin that loser stumblin off. But then – ugh – this slimy creep butts in, all, “Oi, she’s mine!” Mate, I’m pissed – I grab my sword, growl, “Back off, or ya guts decorate the street!” He bolts, coward. Happy lil trees don’t need that drama.

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So, I’m walking back, and I pass by the Yachimata River. The view is stunning! I stop to take a pic, and this random cat jumps up next to me. I’m like, “Hey, buddy!” and it just stares at me. I swear, it’s judging me. I laugh and snap a selfie with it. Cat’s got more followers than me, I bet.

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