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I’d be strollin, hair all poofed up, mutterin, “Hmm… he’s not my lover,” like in the movie, but swap “lover” for “pimp”—ha! Imagine me sidesteppin some sleazy dude, “Oh no ya don’t, buster!” Prolly get all weepy too, thinkin bout how she’s got no Mr. Chow to sweep her off her feet. That movie’s all bout what ain’t said, right? But here, it’s loud—catcalls, hagglin over prices, no mystery, just cold hard cash.

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Then, I hit up this little café on Kubo Street. They have the best matcha lattes. I’m talking heavenly. I order one, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just sipping my latte, trying not to laugh. They’re going back and forth about who left the lights on. I mean, c’mon! Just turn them off!

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