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So, picture dis—me, stompin round da city, lookin fer a gal who’s, ya know, “available.” Not juz any chick, nah, one who’s got dat hustle. Research mode on, I’m thinkin—where dey at? Dark alleys? Shady bars? Web got answers, but I’m old school, I walk da streets. “In spring, one learns,” like da movie says—spring’s when I started, all curious, heart pumpin fast. Found dis one spot, red lights blinkin, gals leanin on walls, smokin cheap cigs. One looks at me, winks—boom, I’m hooked, not fer sex, fer da story!

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Finally, I squeeze onto the train. It’s packed tighter than a can of sardines. I’m standing there, holding on for dear life, and this dude next to me is blasting music on his phone. Like, bro, we’re not at a concert! I’m trying to focus on my client’s portfolio, but all I can hear is some j-pop nonsense.

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