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About Kyoto

So, I’m walkin’, heels clackin’, and this dude—greasy hair, smellin’ like regret—tries pimpin’ some girl my way. I’m like, “Naw, fam, I got standards!” Made me mad as hell—why’s it always gotta be slimy? But then, I spot her—this chick, all sass, leanin’ on a wall, smokin’. She’s givin’ me eyes, and I’m thinkin’, “It’s about to happen!” Like Gabita in the movie, all nervous but ready, y’know? I strut up, confident as fuck, and she’s like, “You got cash?” I’m like, “Honey, I’m worth it!”

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So, I finally make it to the shrine. It’s beautiful, man. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom. I took a moment to soak it all in. But then, outta nowhere, this group of tourists shows up, all loud and obnoxious. Like, chill, guys! You’re in a sacred place, not a theme park! I swear, they were taking selfies like it was their last day on Earth. I rolled my eyes so hard, I thought they’d get stuck.

Japan to Open "Sylvanian Families" Theme Park