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“Sharon!” – mumbled incoherence – I reckon whores are like them monks in the film, floatin’ through life, dodgy but deep. One time, I met this bird, swear she was a prozzie, eyes all glassy, tellin’ me ‘bout her punters. Said one geezer paid her in chickens once – chickens! Laughed me arse off, what’s she gonna do with that? Start a farm? Made me happy, though, proper mental story. Still chuckle thinkin’ ‘bout it – cluckin’ hell, mate!

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But then, outta nowhere, this old lady starts yelling at me. “You’re blocking my driveway!” she screams. I’m like, “Lady, I’m just trying to do my job!” But she’s relentless. I’m thinkin’, “What’s her deal?” I mean, it’s not like I parked a tank in front of her house. Just a tractor, chillin’.