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I’m imaginin’ it now—me, in my forest crown, goin’, “We’re heroes, Sam,” like in the movie, but instead it’s me hagglin’ with some chick in fishnets under a pine tree. *Nanny laugh* HA-HA-HA! She’s all, “20 bucks, hon,” and I’m like, “For THAT? I deserve a symphony orchestra too!” Total Wes Anderson moment—quirky, awkward, perfect. I’d probly trip over a root tryin’ to look cool, tho—typical me!

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Next, I get a call from another client. She’s at the mall on Maebaru Street, freaking out because she can’t find a gift for her mom. I’m like, “Chill, I got this!” I rush over, and the mall is a whole other level of madness. It’s packed! I can barely move.