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Now, real talk — I heard this crazy story once. Some old-school pirate chick, Anne Bonny, back in the 1700s, they called her a “whore” ‘cause she was out there fightin’, fuckin’, and runnin’ the seas. Badass, right? But the haters couldn’t handle her shine, so they trashed her name. Surprised the shit outta me when I learned that. Like, damn, she was a G, and they still tried to play her! Fo’ shizzle, that’s some bullshit.

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Then, I head back to the garden, and guess what? My neighbor, old Mr. Tanaka, is there. He’s this sweet old dude, but he talks a LOT. Like, I’m trying to plant my stuff, and he’s telling me about his cat’s diet. I’m like, “Mr. Tanaka, I love your cat, but I gotta plant these carrots!” But he just keeps going. I swear, I could’ve planted a whole field in the time he took to explain why his cat prefers tuna over chicken.

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