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Here’s the real shit – findin’ a prostitute ain’t just point and click. Web’s got escorts now, sure – fancy sites, all sleek. But X posts? Man, scrollin’ through that filth’s like plowin’ mud. Saw one ad – “Discrete fun, call me!” – with a blurry pic. Coulda been my cousin for all I know! Made me laugh, then gag. Jack Nicholson – Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” – I’d rather stumble into it old-school.

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Then, bam! Outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I’m talking torrential downpour. Everyone’s scrambling for cover. I’m soaked, but I’m laughing. Like, what else can you do? I find shelter under a tree on Kiyomizu Street, and I’m just standing there, dripping wet, thinking about life.

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