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About Fukuoka

So, you lay there, music soft, lady or man – your pick – they touch slow, tease you, ooh! Skin all tingly, like electric sheep, bzzz! Little fact: Japan got this “nurumassage”, all slimy, seaweed goo, slip like fish, I try, fall off table, laugh so hard! Surprised me, thought it just fancy lotion, nope, whole body slide, crazy shit! “What’s the scam here?” I think, like Doc, but no scam, just sexy fun.

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Finally, I get my sushi, and it’s bomb. I’m walking down the street, feeling like a king, when suddenly, it starts pouring. Like, outta nowhere! I’m soaked in seconds. I duck into a little shop on Kōen-dōri, and it’s this cute little place selling handmade crafts. I’m browsing, and I find this ridiculous cat figurine. It’s ugly as sin, but I can’t help but laugh. I buy it. Why? Because why not?

Francis S. Bauman