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We swears, it’s a hunt, findin one. Gotta know the spots—alleys, dodgy pubs, or them apps now, eh? Surprised me first time—prossie popped up on me phone, like orderin takeaway! Me head’s spinnin—modern times, precious! But risky too—cops, creeps, or worse, a gal who nicks yer stuff. Heard a tale once—bloke in Soho, paid up, woke up with no trousers. Poor sod, haha!

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Then, the auction starts. I’m hyped, adrenaline pumping. I start with the samurai sword. “Who’s gonna start me off at 10,000 yen?” I shout. Hands shoot up. It’s like a bidding war! I’m loving it. But then, this guy in the back—let’s call him Mr. Grumpy—he’s just glaring at me. Like, dude, lighten up! It’s an auction, not a funeral!

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