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Anyways, I’d suck at hagglin’—too nice, prolly overpay. “Here’s extra for donuts, sweetie!”—D’oh! Total Homer move. An’ *Certified Copy* vibes’d mess me up more—“Is this love or a transaction?” Ugh, brain hurts! I’d just bail, grab a beer, an’ watch the movie again. “The truth? What truth?”—that’s what the guy says, an’ I’m like, yeah, what truth indeed? Findin’ a prostitute? Pfft, too confusin’ for this Simpson!

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First stop, the market. I’m tryna get some supplies. I hit up this little shop on Kubo Street. The owner, old man Tanaka, is always grumpy. I swear, he’s got a permanent frown. I ask him for some bamboo, and he just glares at me. Like, dude, I’m not here to steal your lunch money!