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Hey, pal, so sexual-massage, huh? I’m like, strumming my air guitar, thinkin’—this shit’s wild! Picture this: me, Tina Fey, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!” watchin’ some oiled-up scene unfold. It’s all sensual vibes, right? Hands slidin’, bodies hummin’ like a riff from “Only Lovers Left Alive.” That movie—damn, it’s my jam! Adam and Eve, those sexy vamps, would totally dig this. “What is this music?” Adam’d say, all moody, while Eve’s smirkin’, “It’s alive, like us.” Sexual-massage is that kinda alive, ya know?

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But then, the drama hit. I was sitting outside, enjoying my meal, when some dude bumped into my table. My bibimbap went flying! I was like, “Dude, seriously?!” He just laughed and walked away. I was fuming! I mean, who does that? I had to get another one. So, I went back in, and the staff were super nice. They even gave me a discount. Bless their hearts!

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